Author: Julz

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The village…

On the Path train Sunday morning. We look tired AF!

We were planning on traveling to my biological mom’s house on Sunday morning, then Marty had the idea to leave from the farmers market in Troy and go into the city for dinner and breakfast, then drive to her place.

Newark Pennsylvania Station.

It was meant to be since he quickly found a hotel room in Newark, NJ, directly across from the train station; our Hilton Honors points come to the rescue again! The ride from Troy to Newark was under two and a half hours. We were there before 5 pm.

We hopped on the Path Train and took it to the World Trade Center stop. This was the same train ride I took daily when I worked downtown. As we got closer to the WTC, I became emotional about 9/11, thinking about the poor people on their way to work or at work on the most horrible day in American history.

We noticed see-through walkways on the floors when we got off the Path. The glass showed the original foundation and columns from the Twin Towers. I had to pull it together; I wasn’t expecting to see that or the other memorial items and reminders so we never forget what happened that day or those who lost their lives.

The new World Trade Center Train Station was beautiful and empty Sunday morning.

Next, we got on the 1 subway line and got off at Christopher Street. I found a 100% gluten-free restaurant I had never heard of before and made a reservation for 8 pm. I looked up gluten-free spots in Greenwich Village the two times I was there earlier this year, but this was the first time Wild popped up.

Wild was not only gluten-free, but the owners wanted it to be a safe place for GF people to dine at. They made everything from scratch and used local and organic products. It was an Italian place, like most Greenwich Village food spots, where the staff spoke with heavy Italian accents. The place was legit and small.

Our fried calamari and Marty’s Abruzzo lamb meatballs and rigatoni. The place was dark so are the photos I took. I don’t use filters; I post the real McCoy.

We didn’t mind being crammed into the small, noisy, busy restaurant filled with excitement and great energy. We were the oldest diners in the restaurant by 25 years, but that didn’t bother us in the least bit.

It was primarily young gluten-free women out to dinner with their girlfriends. There were men there too, but the ratio of women to men tipped the scales.

The food was incredible! We had the most delicious fried calamari we ever had, even before we had to go gluten-free. We have found gluten-free fried calamari at other restaurants, but this one went above and beyond. The squid was so tender, with a crispy exterior and excellent flavor. Their marinara sauce was delicious!

Marty’s dinner of house-made rigatoni with a lamb ragu was tiny Abruzzo meatballs like I made last week. Weird. I had house-made butternut squash ravioli in a tomato cream sauce. It was so good; I ate it so fast I didn’t get a photo of it.

The only bummer was when we asked our dashing young Italian waiter about dessert, he had to break the bad news to us; everything was sold out. Waaahhhhhh! Damn!

We headed back to our hotel, went to bed, and woke up, which felt like only an hour later; it was longer, but we were living in the New York minute and got back on the Path to go out to breakfast at the best gluten-free bagel shop in the country called Modern Bread and Bagel.

Sunday morning.

We ate at Modern Bread and Bagel in the city back in March up on the upper west side. This was a new location in Chelsea. We got off the subway on 14th Street, and the bagel place was across the street! Brilliant!

Modern Bread and Bagel is 100% gluten-free and kosher. We ordered our breakfasts and sat at a cute table for two. We sipped our coffees and ate our bagels like regular New Yorkers. It felt wonderful to feel like ordinary people and order whatever we wanted without worry in my favorite part of the city.

Everything bagel with veggie cream cheese, arugula, pickled onions, and tomato. They have great Americano coffee plus black and white cookies and rugelach to go. Yum!

We grabbed two black and white cookies and two chocolate chip rugelach and headed back to Newark. We got on the road at 11:00 am and headed to see my mom, an hour and a half away.

What a fun and spontaneous side trip. Marty and I learned during covid that we couldn’t keep waiting and making excuses for not doing the things we love to do. Yes, we were tired, and our legs felt like rubber after standing at the farmers market all day and then keeping up the fast pace of walking in the train stations and streets.

Every train we were on was clean! This train car just had its floor mopped! This was great to see how well taken care of everything was. The train riders were courteous to each other; New Yorkers are amiable people, and now what you think.

We both slept on the Path train in the morning on our way to Chelsea. I used to sleep on the Path every day, so this brought back some beautiful memories for me. We realized how easy traveling to the city is, and it doesn’t have to be a once-a-year thing; hell, I’ve been there three times this year!

We got home from my mom’s today, Tuesday afternoon. We had a lovely and fun visit with her. After we unloaded Skye, I made my mini pumpkin and pecan pie tarts for Thanksgiving.

Tomorrow I’ll do the rest of my Thanksgiving prep before I go to belly dance classes. Luckily, we weren’t flooded with orders like usual while we were away; it makes sense since almost every wholesale customer got their deliveries last week.

I love prepping and cooking Thanksgiving dinner. I am not doing anything fancy this year, just the basics. I will make my turkey as I saw on Youtube last week; I can’t wait to try it! I’ll let you know how it goes.

Travel safely, sharpen your knives before prepping, and don’t stress. The more things you do ahead will take a lot of stress away on Thanksgiving Day, I promise!

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Hot German potato salad…

Mise en place.

Before Marty and I created The Vermont Spätzle Company, I used to make regular spätzle like everyone in the world does, ours is the only one of its kind, and we make a lot of it. If you don’t know, we don’t use wheat in our spätzle, so it’s gluten-free, it’s also lighter, and you don’t have to boil it, just a quick sauté.

I used to make regular wheat spätzle maybe four times a year; I also used to make hot German potato salad from time to time as something different to serve. I should say that I haven’t made it often since the kids wouldn’t eat it or try it.

Hot German potato salad is a lost dish from the old country people used to make; I’m not sure if anyone makes it anymore. I don’t think I’ve ever seen it served at someone’s home or in a restaurant other than a German one.

Marty and his dad, Hans, used to belong to the Vermont Garden Railway Society. Members take turns hosting the event. The summer after Marty’s mother passed away; it was our turn. His dad was looking forward to it and was excited to come to our place and show off the garden railroad.

This was many years ago, long before our spätzle business. We didn’t have Otto and Klaus yet, so the grass was in great shape. However, the train layout needed work, along with the numerous flower beds and plants in the layout.

The property needed to be immaculate, and it was. Our local garden club sponsors tours of the people’s gardens and properties in town. The tour was the day after the train meet, so it worked out perfectly.

At the train meets, people bring potluck-type dishes. I told the club that I would provide the food without worrying about cross-contamination issues since we were extremely gluten sensitive.

People try their best to make safe gluten-free food but don’t realize gluten masquerades as many other ingredient names. They also don’t understand using a spoon from a gluten-laden dish and then taking something gluten-free with the same spoon will make me sick for close to a week. It’s true.

I served grilled bratwurst and other German sausages, red cabbage with apples and onions, hot German potato, and a black forest sheet cake for the train meet. I made a couple of other things, but I don’t remember what they were.

I made more dressing than usual since we won’t be eating it for a few days; if not, the potatoes will suck up the sauce, which will be dry.

When I planned the menu, I didn’t know that 80% of the train club members and their wives who also came along were Germans. German people may be hard to please when it comes to German food, but I knew my dishes were delicious and if they hated it, so be it.

We had a gorgeous summer day and a big turnout for the train meet. I finished preparing the German buffet and called everyone to lunch. I admit I was nervous when grilling the sausages and reheating the red cabbage and potato salad. I took some vodka from the freezer and drank a small glass of “ice water.” I wasn’t nervous anymore.

Sam was in the 7th grade and looks so little in the green shirt on the right!

I didn’t take any food photos; I didn’t even think about it since I was scurrying around getting everything out hot at the same time. I wish I had, though. The black forest cake was amazing!

The club members were older people, very conservative and traditional. Some looked stern others seemed nice. While they filled their plates, I refilled my “ice water.” I watched them eat, and everyone ate silently. Did they like it or not? It was hard to tell.

I thought they ate silently because maybe that is how they were raised. After they finished eating, I got compliments galore. Everyone loved the food! The one man who seemed stern said to me in a whisper, “Your red cabbage was even better than my mother’s.”

I started to cut the black forest cake and handed it out. I was relaxed and chatted with everyone. When someone told me how delicious the black forest cake was, I said to them that was the biggest compliment since it was gluten-free. Gluten-free, they gasped; I laughed and was pleased.

One man spoke up, almost for the group. He started by saying they didn’t know what to expect before arriving. He went on to say what a lovely hostess I was; the food was better than his mother’s German food too.

He added I made everyone feel welcome and made everything look effortless. Then he complimented Marty and Sam on the outdoor garden railway.

This photo is not from the train meet but from the same week. I didn’t dress quite as revealing for the meet, but I did wear my skull necklace! LOL.

I stood there in my black sundress, both arms with tattooed sleeves, and my whole back covered in ink as well. When I talked to the wives earlier, they stared at my nose and the medusa piercing under my nose. I had an excellent buzz cranking and didn’t let it bother me.

I think the women were especially ready to judge me, but after meeting me, my tattoos and piercings didn’t matter, or that I was at least 20 years younger than everyone present. I was judged on my food and entertainment skills, not my appearance. Maybe I changed their minds about people living the tattooed lifestyle?

The railroad society members enjoyed themselves, and so did I, something I didn’t expect to happen. I stressed about it for a couple of weeks; I wanted everything to be perfect, which never happens.

In the end, we pulled it off. Marty and Sam did a lot of work outside to get everything ready for the meet, and it all paid off; people were impressed with their garden railroad!

This is the recipe I use from my 1950 Betty Crocker cookbook. I tweak it a little to my taste, but it’s delicious as is. I quadrupled it for the train meet, and it came out perfectly.

Today, I am making a batch of German potato salad to take on the road with us this weekend; it will go with some German sausages. We are going to visit my mom (biological) for a couple of days. Yay!

We haven’t seen each other since last May, and we look forward to it. She and I are alike in many ways, and I love getting to know her better whenever I am with her. Marty notices how our mannerisms and other things are blatantly similar even though sometimes we can’t see them.

I respect my mother’s wishes and privacy, so even though I will take some photos of Marty and me, I won’t be posting any of her, but I will write about our visit. We won’t be back until Tuesday, so that I will catch up with you guys then. I plan to unplug and stay off my email and social media accounts, enjoying the people I am with in person.

Happy Friday and have a nice weekend, everyone! By the way, if you have a large turkey in the freezer, take it out tonight and defrost it properly and safely in a pan in the refrigerator; you’ll thank me Wednesday when you start your holiday prepping. ❤️

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Spaghetti con le polpettone…

Spaghetti with tiny meatballs.

I found out on Sunday we’ve been eating spaghetti and meatballs wrong. I watched a Youtube video about tiny meatballs from Abruzzo, Italy. I added the link to the Youtube video to my “Always a student” blog post.

Right after I watched the video, I knew I wanted to make those tiny meatballs right away, so I did, and they came out fantastic. Marty and Sam loved them too!

The tiny meatballs were fun to eat and reminded me of those little meatballs in Spaghettos that I ate when I was little. I always pierced a meatball first, then used my fork to get the rings on the tines of my fork.

Of course, I got yelled at for playing with my food, but I still tried every time I ate Spaghettos. I loved the little hotdog version too!

These tiny meatballs are not for the faint of heart when working in the kitchen and not for someone who doesn’t enjoy cooking to attempt. Trust me on this one.

Tiny meatballs on a standard 16-inch pizza pan. No, I didn’t count how many there were.

Measuring the 1/2 tsp of meatball mix took me a while, but I didn’t mind since I love doing kitchen tasks and prep. Rolling the meatballs went pretty quickly, and of course, I had to space them out evenly because I am a perfectionist asshole in the kitchen.

After I cooked the meatballs, I added them to the sauce and let it cook until it reduced. I let it cool and popped it in the fridge until tonight. I am a firm believer that sauce always tastes better the next day. These tiny meatballs and the sauce tasted good indeed!

I always have to taste a meatball before I put the pot in the fridge.

Even though we are noodle makers, I made gluten-free spaghetti because I wanted the whole experience; plus, we don’t have any spätzle at the moment since we are only making it for wholesale orders right now. Every noodle counts.

Worth the time and effort! Tiny, tasty, and tender. The tomato sauce was like velvet with a gorgeous color and sheen. Mmmm!

The interesting thing about these meatballs was instead of adding milk as I do with my soft and fluffy meatballs, the chef used ricotta cheese which I may continue to use even in my regular-size meatballs. He also mixed the meatballs differently; I will continue doing it his way since I like how they came out.

Will I make tiny meatballs again? Totally! Will I do it every time I make meatballs? No, they are time-consuming. However, I will be in the cooking mood on a rainy, snowy, or yucky day. This recipe gets two thumbs up! 👍 👍

Arrivederci! 🇮🇹

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Always a student…

While I’ve been teaching cooking and belly dancing for a long time, I am always a student. I am constantly searching for new techniques and strive to get better every day with both my passions.

For example, I learn from each new student I teach at belly dance. What are their strengths and weaknesses? How do they hold their weight, or can they ground themselves? Do they have body awareness?

According to Healthline…Body awareness is how conscious and connected you are to your own body. It’s also known as kinesthesia or the awareness of the position and movement of body parts in relation to muscles and joints. In short, it’s how you recognize where your body is in space.

I use body awareness when teaching dance moves with this similar technique… A simple way to increase body awareness is to practice a type of meditation called the body scan. This is a technique of intentionally paying attention to different parts of the body in sequence, and to really focus on the sensations that are present without judging them. Source UVA Health

When I am teaching any dance move, I ask everyone to notice what side of their body their weight is on and what part of their feet or legs they are using. Is their chest lifted? Are they looking down? It goes on and on but makes people understand what I am feeling, not just doing.

In the last belly dance class my friend Bethany taught with me, I learned something new when making the ribcage rotation move. I heard her say she put her weight slightly back for a more extensive range of motion.

I am positive Bethany said something similar over the decade we taught together, but this was the first time I was ready to hear it. That’s right, hear it.

Three weeks ago, when we explained how to turn for one move, Kathleen shared with the students what she did with her one foot. We tried it, and it worked easier than how we were doing it. Has she always said that, and I wasn’t ready to hear that tip too?

When I say ready to hear, I mean at the point or level of understanding what your body has to do to better the technique of the move you are working on.

Students will always say, “Oh, now I get it; you never said that before.” I always reply, “No, you weren’t ready to hear it before.” Ask any of my students because this couldn’t be closer to the truth.

The same thing applies to cooking. I am a great cook. I’ve cooked professionally and love to cook at home and entertain. I am not a chef; I am a cook. I taught myself everything I know and have been practicing for decades.

I cook a lot, two meals every day. That’s a shit ton of cooking, but I love it. It’s my relaxation, how I show people how much I love them and how I can express myself through my food. Like dance, it’s my creative outlet.

Saturday, we had an unexpected absence from our farmers market in Troy. Marty drove himself to the ER because his heart was in A-fib. Did he wake me to go with him? Of course not. He’s a stubborn asshole of a German, that’s why. He wanted to let me sleep. That was a nice gesture, but I was upset, to say the least.

When he got home from the hospital, he asked me if I still wanted to go to the market. The first thing I think I asked him was if he was out of his fucking mind, then I went on to say it was too late to go to the market, he was awake all night, and my back was still killing me. I also needed to pick up a new prescription for him at 11 am.

How did we spend our “sick day” on Saturday? It’s easy to go down the rabbit hole when watching YouTube. Marty can get lost for hours watching foreign food factories make different products. With no talking, just machinery sounds.

One night when I got home from belly dance, Sam reported that Marty had been watching videos of Korean food factories since I left 5 hours ago. We died laughing when Marty said it was interesting.

On Sunday morning, we stumbled on a series called “Not another cooking show.” The guy was a guido-type chef from NY, and we liked him. We watched him cook a few dishes, including how he makes his Thanksgiving turkey, and he introduced us to mini meatballs. He blew my mind! Seriously, he did; it was brilliant! 🤯

I will be making my turkey stock for gravy and turkey his way. Where has this guy been hiding for so long? He has dozens of shows making many of my favorite or most popular foods. I can’t believe he never came up before on Youtube.

He is an excellent teacher who explains everything clearly and shows his technique using a dozen different cameras to catch the correct angles. He has a good personality and is cut to the chase like I am.

I NEVER buy a kitchen gadget based upon watching someone else using an item; I always thought it was a paid endorsement or a scam; until today. I went on Amazon and purchased the fat separator he used with a release button on the bottom. Again, where has this thing been for the number of gravies, stocks, and soups I make?

The spätzle orders are pouring in for Thanksgiving, and I started feeling overwhelmed today. I had to tell myself we needed to fill one order at a time, take one production day at a time, put our heads down and work our asses off. Our distributor has a reduced delivery schedule next week, so things must be brought to them sooner than usual.

Late this afternoon, while I made tonight’s dinner, I also made tomorrow night’s since I have a follow-up appointment at my doctor’s office in the afternoon. Having dinner almost ready to go will help make things smoother when I get home, and we are starving. This takes the pressure off me, making it worthwhile.

I made the mini meatballs and sauce by following the Youtube guy’s video. I followed the meatball part exactly but made my sauce the way I usually make it. I tasted one of those delicious little balls and was happy with how they came out.

The guy tells his audience this mini meatball dish is a dish of love, and it is. I like getting into the zone when doing kitchen prep and banging these suckers out quickly for the first time. Let someone else make it for you if you don’t like to cook. It is a lot of work if you aren’t used to cooking.

Here are the two links to the videos: Turkey & Meatballs.

It’s late, and we must be in the production kitchen before dawn tomorrow morning, so good night! I’ll let you know if the mini meatballs were a hit or not.

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Eee-ouch…

The grass looks like springtime!

The hot and cold weather makes my arthritis unbearable. My back and left hip have been hurting since Monday. Today, is the worst.

At belly dance classes on Wednesday, my back and hip hurt so bad it made me stop a couple of times. I can always push through pain, but it was tough.

Production this week was brutal so I was happy today I only had to go to Saratoga, NY to make a couple of deliveries. Ouch!

The only part of the trip that wasn’t horrible was driving with the heated seats which I keep them on all year because of my back.

Everywhere was crowded since it is a holiday. I was behind every slow driver possible and the ride home took forever.

Right now, I’m laying on a heating pad and trying to relax to get some relief. I’ve had arthritis since my 20’s so this is nothing new, just cumbersome.

Happy Friday, we are meeting friends at the Inn across the street for a drink later, this will not stop me from doing that.

Happy Friday! Have a good weekend!

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Purging project…

For the last few years, I’ve been slowly getting rid of junk; I should say ridiculous shit we’ve kept around for decades. I no longer have a sentimental attachment to things; a few years ago, I did get rid of some kitchen items I regretted during the holidays.

I forgot I gave away things I used when making a holiday meal for more than 4 of us. I quickly made do with what I had, so keeping it wasn’t that important.

Ten years ago, I purged my personal belongings throughout the summer. It took nine contractor-size bags to donate or throw away things I didn’t need. Why in fucks name did I still keep stretched-out hair scrunchies in a drawer with other 80s shit. I lugged that crap four times when we moved.

My thoughts were that I didn’t want my boys to have to go through stupid stuff after I was gone. All it did was take up space and was utterly unnecessary to save. I didn’t want to alarm my family, thinking I was suicidal again, so I did it slowly, one bag at a time.

In 2013, my adopted mother, Eileen, had a stroke. It was determined early on that she would never be able to return to her apartment. I was grieving her loss of independence and dreading the thought of cleaning out her apartment. She had a lot of stuff!

Marty and I moved her by ourselves from NJ to VT to a 2-bedroom apartment after she sold her house in Iselin in only nine days. No inspections, sold as is. The good news was she sold quickly.

The bad news was that it was a HUGE, GIGANTIC job moving all her and my father’s things they had accumulated for 39 years in such a short period, with two young children to worry about.

We threw out, donated, and brought the rest of the stuff to VT. We hated it, but it had to be done. Was Eileen any help? What do you think? Not really. My role as Cinderella was making a comeback.

Then guess what happened? Two years after, she was living in her lovely garden apartment with a nice patio; she decided she wanted to be on the second floor right above where she was living in a one-bedroom apartment.

I nearly exploded and was barely able to hold it together. Marty had the same reaction when I told him she needed to be upstairs by the end of the month. UGH!! This woman thought of no one but herself. She had to downsize since the apartment was smaller. Not a problem for her; she sold her furniture to buy new stuff. For a shopaholic like Eileen, this was a dream come true.

We thought lugging her shit out of the moving van into the first-floor apartment was tough, but we had to move everything up a long narrow flight of stairs. She had an attic in this apartment where we needed to store many of her things using one of those pulldown ladders. Did I mention this was in the middle of the summer, and we both felt like we had heat stroke? UGH!

Over the two years after she moved to VT, it was apparent she bought many new clothes, shoes, handbags, jackets, and jewelry. So much I’ll jump ahead; she spent all my dad’s insurance money and the proceeds from selling her house; she had to go bankrupt in 2009. This was shocking to us. What a waste!

So back to the beginning of the story. Since she would be residing in a care facility, I had to move her belongings out of that apartment again! Alone because Marty was working up in Rutland, VT, and not Bennington like he did for the last move.

My mother had four large closets packed with clothes, shoes, scarves, and handbags. The attic was stuffed with more stuff. I was so overwhelmed and only had a month to get it done since I wasn’t going to pay out of my pocket for another month’s rent.

This almost killed me physically and emotionally. Plus, she was a constant, demanding bitch wondering why I wasn’t spending more time with her at the care facility. UGH! I almost had a nervous breakdown, which also tormented my ulcerative colitis.

In the end, I took an enormous amount of brand-new clothes, shoes, and handbags, all with the tags still on them, to a consignment store. I got a whopping $165 for all of it. I used that money to buy big storage totes at Home Depot. There were 27 oversized totes of clothing, shoes, coats, handbags, and other items.

I made 17 trips to Goodwill, getting rid of stuff that couldn’t go to the consignment store. I am not exaggerating; she had so many clothing and accessories.

She bought one in every color. Every top, turtleneck, sweater, pant, scarf, and shoe, you name it, was in every color she could find. A lot of the items still had tags on them. The funny thing is, she wore the same shit every time I saw her.

No wonder she went bankrupt; afterward, she must have used my dad’s pension and social security for shopping since she had no more credit cards. She always said she was barely getting by and was afraid she would run out of money. She still got her mani, pedi, and hair done, though.

After sorting through and moving, all that stuff made me sick. It made me never want to go shopping again. I still hate shopping. She ruined it for me.

Time ran out on me, so we had to rent a storage unit to bring her kitchenware, china, pots, pans, and the rest of everything.

I sold the furniture; there was no fucking way Marty and I were going to carry it down those stairs after struggling to get it up. People got a good deal since everything was in good condition. I used that money to pay for the large storage unit. The people who bought the furniture had to move it themselves.

The day I finished cleaning and closed up the apartment for good, I had a mini nervous breakdown. I sat on the wood floor and cried until I ran to the bathroom I had just cleaned and puked.

Then I cried more. Then I got angry. Then I cried more. I didn’t even have the energy to stand up and drive home. Did I mention that she was still badgering me about why I wasn’t spending enough time with her?

A couple of weeks ago, I decided to purge our basement. Back to the why should the kids have to clean out all our shit someday popped back into my mind. I made an announcement that no one could ask or look at what I was throwing away. If it were something important, it wouldn’t have been down in the basement for years and years.

This was week two; I decided to go through a large storage cabinet. Then I saw it. The twenty-pound bag of costume jewelry I shoved in there nine years ago. I went through her real jewelry when I packed her things up, which didn’t take long since I realized she had hocked it all to go shopping. WTF was wrong with this woman?

I took the heavy bag upstairs and noticed I neatly put items in jewelry boxes. I must have gotten sick to my stomach or mad at that point; I just threw the rest in a plastic bag, which ripped; because it was so heavy, I shoved it into one of her expensive sturdy tote bags.

Today, I was hoping to find some pieces of jewelry I liked since none of her clothing or shoes fit me; everything was too small or short. As I went through the shitty junk jewelry, I felt that same anger return again. I felt sick to my stomach. I never shed a tear when she passed away and thought maybe seeing this stuff may make me mushy and cry. Well, that didn’t happen.

I decided instead of throwing it all away; I would put aside dress-up jewelry for a few little girls I knew. There was plenty to go around. I found a few things I kept and decided that if I didn’t wear them in a year, I’d get rid of them too.

Dress-up jewelry for some little friends in a small number of trinket boxes she had.

I saved one small box of gold jewelry if I ever have a granddaughter someday. I also kept one small box of real gold items she must have missed when she hocked everything my dad ever bought her. I put the box of ugly gold jewelry in a safe to cash in someday.

The stuff I kept, which I will probably not wear. The cameo will go in my Halloween costume box.

The good news is I filled a recycling container and trash can with useless shit from the basement, too—a pretty good start with the purging project!

I needed to write about this tonight. I absolutely have to let it go. Everything is finally gone, so there is no use in staying angry or upset about it anymore. This woman pushed me over the edge so many times I honestly don’t know how I did it.

Oh, I know how and why I did it; I promised my father before he died, we would always watch over and take care of her, which we did for 21 years. That was a promise I didn’t know how difficult it would be.

My writing mentor and friend Jon Katz challenged me a while back and told me to think of why and how I am and to share it with my readers. I wrote over a year and a half ago about how I hated pampering. He challenged me on that blog post with a phone call. Lol.

Guess what? I finally know! Because my mother was a pampered princess! She got her nails done every week. Every month, she got a pedicure, haircut, and color. She didn’t do the dishes because of her nails. Dragged my father shopping or out to eat constantly because she didn’t like to cook.

After I moved to VT and she spent years bitching that she had to clean, she finally got a cleaning lady because she didn’t have me as her maid anymore. (BTW, she automatically thought I would clean her apartment when she moved to VT, and I asked her if she was kidding.)

I’ve lived my entire life since I was 9, trying to act the exact opposite of her, which isn’t hard to do since I am nothing like her in the first place. I am a lot like my biological mom, which I absolutely love. I am so happy I have her in my life.❤️

Thanks for listening; I really needed it. I feel better now.

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How to eat Chinese food…

I love Chinese food! I love Chinese and Italian food so much that I could eat them every day and never tire of it. This was the biggest dilemma for me to choose when we went out for my birthday dinner when I was little. Chinese or Italian?

For many years Marty and I were unable to eat many of the Chinese dishes we love so much because they contain soy sauce which contains wheat, or dishes that are fried in the same oil that is used for wheat items. That’s called gluten cross-contamination.

Last year, we learned from a couple at the Troy Farmers Market who are gluten-free, not by choice like us, about a Chinese place in Latham, NY, that they love. Marty and I were like, what? Don’t tease us.

Sure enough, Ala Shanghai has many dishes we have missed. Everything is clearly marked on the menu, and the staff is careful about cross-contamination. The food and service are wonderful. It was last year’s food miracle for us!

We had a big delivery day on Thursday after production, which ended in the Albany area. We had to go to Troy, to the Atrium Building, where we set up our vendor booth for the first indoor market on Saturday.

It was almost 4 pm when we were done, and hadn’t eaten lunch yet. We went to our favorite place Ala Shanghai! We’ve tried a few things on their menu, and everything is delicious, but we both keep ordering Sesame Beef in Brown Sauce with Rice; every single time.

It’s pieces of lacquered crispy pieces of beef in a delicious sauce and with sesame seeds. It is so good that I get so sad while eating it that it will disappear. This happens to me a lot when I eat something I love; the happiness turns to dread until I can eat it again.

We found out a long time ago food is not the same when it’s take-out. I firmly believe besides pizza; most things lose their crispiness or freshness when shoved in a container to keep them warm. Soups, cold sandwiches, and mushy things are usually ok, though.

One day when we were having lunch at Ala Shanghai, we were sitting next to a young Chinese couple. They had so much food on their table and ate slowly. We noticed they kept their rice in the little bowl it comes in and used it as a resting place for the food on their chopsticks.

There are always plenty of Chinese couples and families in Ala Shanghai, and I noticed them eating this way as well. I tried it, and it’s brilliant! It took me 55 years to learn this or pay attention to how other cultures eat.

The people I watched didn’t load up the plate the restaurant provides for your entree; instead, they put the bowl of rice in the middle of the plate. When you take a piece of food with your chopsticks from a platter that is too big for one bite, you rest it on top of the rice. The rice soaks up all the flavors and is eaten slowly during the meal.

The other dish I order every time is Steamed Shrimp Dumplings. Dumplings are usually not gluten-free; oh, how we missed them terribly. Ala Shanghai has many different types of dumplings we can’t have, but they have the shrimp one, and I love shrimp. Double score!

The servers are always careful that the small bowl of soy sauce to dip the shrimp dumplings is gluten-free. The dumplings are made fresh, in-house. We have watched servers sit at tables after the lunch rush making dumplings for dinner.

The shrimp inside the dumpling wrapper is flavored with garlic, toasted sesame oil, and snaps; it’s so fresh and crisp when you eat it. The dumpling wrappers are delicate and look like tiny parcels of deliciousness. Mmmmmm!

I made Italian food tonight that was so good I could have easily overeaten, but then I would have felt uncomfortable and upset with myself for making a pig of myself. I always put my fork down the second I feel full; this is dedication when I eat something I love. I must remind myself there will be leftovers to enjoy the next day.

I took demo photos of the dinner I made tonight. It has options to be healthier and even vegan if that’s what you want. I have to write the recipe and will share it when I am done. I took photos of a kitchen hack that made food prep faster.

Happy Friday! Have a great weekend! I’ll catch up with you guys soon!

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Apple crisp…

I love history, especially American history. I also love food, so combining both is the best. If I ever wanted to go back to school, it would be to become a food anthropologist. I am intrigued by what people eat and where recipes come from. It is a wonderful way to understand how different cultures and societies lived.

I figured I would make an apple crisp to write about and post my recipe. I know many people still have a surplus of apples hanging around after apple picking. The number of apples never looks like much when picking them, but it’s a different story when you get home.

Apple crisp is a “newer” dessert. I say newer because it was created in 1924 during World War l and food rationing when ingredients for apple pies weren’t available. It became an instant success.

Apple crisp is made with apple slices, sugar, lemon juice, and spices. The topping is streusel made with flour, oats, sugar, butter, and spices. Besides the apples, all the other ingredients are essential pantry items.

A month ago, I wrote a blog post about a gigantic pear crisp I made for the night shift at our local hospital ER, where my son Sam works as an RN. I didn’t post a recipe since I didn’t have one. I just winged it and hoped for the best. It turned out delicious, thankfully.

Cover the apples evenly with the streusel topping. I like to mine with make large streusel crumbs.

Last week I picked up a bag of apples and decided to make an apple crisp. I wanted to write down my recipe and post it. It can be made with apples or pears. It’s one of the easiest dessert recipes; the most challenging part is peeling the apples and cutting them into slices or chunks. I like slices since I think they look better.

Classic apple crisp isn’t diet food by any means, but since it doesn’t include a fat-laden pastry crust, you can make it any way you wish. There are recipes for healthy, gluten-free (mine has the option), and vegan apple crisps.

Right out of the oven. It smells divine in here.

You can add less butter and sugar, add more oats or different types of flour, add how much or little topping you would like, and add more apples or pears. You can add additional spices or leave out ones you don’t like. It’s such a versatile dessert.

Here is the recipe I used tonight. You can double it to make a 9×13 pan instead of the 8×8 pan I used. The amount of spices is to my taste, so if you want to add more or less, it’s up to you. The salt in the recipe is important as it brings out the flavors and rounds out the taste.

Please keep in mind I am not a professional food blogger with expensive fancy recipe-writing programs; if you are looking for nutritional information. My recipes are straightforward recipes that I have tasted and tested for accuracy cutting out fussy unnecessary steps and dishes. Enjoy!

Apple Crisp

Ingredients

The filling:

6 firm apples peeled and sliced into 1/4-inch slices
1/4 cup granulated sugar
1 Tbsp lemon juice
1 Tbsp cornstarch
1 tsp vanilla extract
1 1/2 tsp cinnamon
1/2 tsp nutmeg
1/4 tsp ground ginger
1/4 tsp salt

The streusel topping:

1/2 cup all-purpose flour or gluten-free all-purpose flour
1/2 cup old-fashioned rolled oats or gluten-free oats
1/3 cup packed brown sugar
3 Tbsp granulated sugar
1/4 tsp cinnamon
1/8 tsp nutmeg
1/8 tsp salt
8 Tbsp butter cut into small cubes

Directions:

Preheat oven to 425 degrees F. Grease an 8×8 pan with softened butter or pan spray; set aside.

To make the filling: Whisk all the filling ingredients together in a small bowl. In the 8×8 pan, add the apples and the filling ingredients. Stir gently or use your hands to combine until the apples are evenly coated with the spiced sugar mixture.

To make the streusel topping: Add all ingredients to a medium size bowl. Mix and squeeze the butter with the dry ingredients with a fork or your hands until crumbly. Continue to squeeze, forming large streusel crumbles.

Add the streusel topping covering the apples evenly. Bake at 425 degrees F until the apples are bubbling around the edges and the topping is golden brown, about 30 minutes.

To prevent the topping from burning, check often and rotate the pan halfway through baking. Remove from oven and cool on a wire rack for 15 minutes. Serve warm or cold, topped with vanilla ice cream if desired.

Makes 6-8 servings

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Daddy’s home…

Marty looks exhausted, but Otto and especially Klausie are all smiles.

Marty and Sam were away for a few days at an EMS conference; I stayed home with Otto and Klaus. I posted their photos at the end of my middle world post sitting by the back door waiting for them. Klaus also sat on the sixth step of the stairs going upstairs to keep watch out the front door.

They can tell the sound of their trucks from down the street. Klaus jumped up, looked out the front window, and screamed, running to the back door and flying out the doggie door.

Both dogs ran from Marty to Sam back and forth. I am chop meat around here, and only suitable for feeding time. Lol. They were very good boys for me and weren’t needy until today.

While the guys were away, I cooked and ate what I felt like. At first, I joked I would eat peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches the whole time, but I cooked.

I made a pot of Thai Mango Chicken Curry with leftover rice on Friday night. I also made a pot of Autumn Bisque Soup. To be called a bisque, there has to be cream in the soup. The cream in this soup is a scoop of vanilla ice cream that is stirred into the hot soup. It’s heavenly and to die for. I also made a batch of Curried Chicken Salad.

My friend Maria was coming for lunch; I wanted to make something seasonal. These two dishes go nicely together and are a perfect lunch combo.

Maria gave me the most awesome bottle of wine, complete with its own vampire cape. 🧛‍♀️

Maria and I finally got to chat, something we don’t get to do at the dance studio. She and I are alike in so many ways; getting to know each other better is nice. We only know what’s going on in each other’s lives by reading our blogs. Maria’s blog is Full Moon Fiber Art, something to check out, especially if you love farm animals and art.

Autumn Bisque Soup with Curried chicken salad studded with golden raisins and dried cranberries with apples was one of the faculty’s favorite salads I made when I cooked in the school’s kitchens. A lot of students enjoyed it as well.

After Maria’s visit, I started getting ready for the Halloween party I was going to across the street at the Arlington Inn and Spa. My make-up took an hour and a half, and my hair was only about 20 minutes. Before I left, I had time to throw down some leftover Thai curry and three tequila shots. 😜

Sugar Skull

The party was a lot of fun, and I knew and met a lot of people. I nibbled on some of the charcuterie platters and had a couple of drinks. The party ended at 10, so I left at 10:13 and was home by 10:15 since it’s a few steps from my house. Perfect!

In the foyer of the Arlington Inn & Spa.

When I got home, I made my trashy nachos and slammed down a ton of water. I was craving biscuits and gravy, but that would have to wait until morning.

Trashy nachos with chili beans, Velveeta, and lettuce.

I tried a new gluten-free biscuit recipe and was pleased with how light and fluffy the biscuits came out. I made a pan of sausage gravy, and breakfast was served. Yum! It was exactly what I wanted to have.

Light and fluffy GF biscuits. Better than I expected, which is always a good thing.

After looking at them, I took photos of the food I made and realized that I made all brown food. The picture of the sausage gravy looked like vomit, so I didn’t post that one for sure. Lol.

Biscuits and gravy are one of my all-time favorite breakfasts, tied with Eggs Benedict.

The weekend went quickly; even though they were the ones away, it was like a weekend retreat for me, including a fun party. I’m glad they are home, and now Marty finally has a chance to relax a little; so can Klaus, who is snoring on the couch as I type.

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The middle world…

My ghostbusters kit.

I saved writing about the middle world for last, thinking it was the most over-the-top and scary for people to read about. 

While it’s true, thoughts of haunted houses, ghosts that can’t cross over, and negative energies are frightening, especially how each is portrayed in movies and tv. 

Am I a chicken when it comes to watching scary movies and reading horror books? You bet your ass I am. Funny right?

The last house clearing I did for my friends a couple of weeks ago helped me sort through my emotions, and I realized why I was chosen to work in the middle world. I say chosen because, as a healer and light worker, the middle world is not somewhere I would ever decide to go.

Over the last 15 years, I’ve helped hundreds of lost souls or ghosts cross over to the other side. The last 13 people I met and helped made me think of their situations compassionately, even if they were difficult, mean, or an asshole, putting it bluntly, something or someone made them that way. 

No one wants to grow up that way, but shit happens to good people. It’s my job to figure out why they are stuck and who I need help from on the other side, such as spirit guides, angels, passed family members, and power animals. Most importantly, I must do my job so the ghosts can trust and listen to me. 

At the end of all my clearings, I’ve been successful in helping them move on. Only in one situation, I saw something that scared the crap out of me. In another blog post, I wrote you will be unsuccessful if you are afraid and show any fear at all. I didn’t even try.

I will not give those fourth-dimensional evil entities more than a short paragraph. I was afraid, so after discussing with my friend and former house-clearing partner, while I was at the farmers market, she blasted the place with love and light, something that evil beings despise. 

Ev lovingly sent them to a place where they can never harm anyone or anything through all bands of the time. Boy, was I glad she is such a powerful light worker and took care of this for me remotely by using reiki energy. What a relief!

Human souls or ghosts come from a place of love and light (God) and will almost always respond and return to it. These black blobs of pure evilness hated it. Good always overcomes evil.

So what and where is the middle world? I’ll do my best to describe it. It is on the same plane or dimension as earth. It is a parallel non-ordinary version of our world. Beauty, trickery, strangeness, horror, and lost or stolen objects and souls are in the middle world.

The middle world is where vibes and thoughts happen; the old saying thoughts become things is the middle world. It is also where psychic phenomena, extra-sensory perception, and unexplained things happen. It is where disease ad illness manifests themselves. Again, back to thoughts become things.

The first time I visited the middle world, I didn’t understand where or why I was there. It didn’t look like the earth; it was gray, dark, and gloomy. Right after I first went to the middle world, I began hearing voices or people talking to me. This is considered crazy. Well, then, call me crazy.

As soon as the thought or word of a place needed clearing, some of the stuck beings or lost souls began speaking to me. It’s always when I am awake and focused on something like driving or performing tasks that require little thinking, like cleaning.

At first, I was like, what the fuck is happening, and who is this? All the people who reached out were women who were traumatized, abused, very sick, or frightened. It figures it was the women asking for directions to go home, not the men. 😂

By the end of my drive or project, I knew their story. I was able to go to the middle world and help free them from whatever chained them to this world. 

When it was time for the in-person house clearing, all the ghosts were gone already, and we were there to blast the place with reiki and do a physical blessing. 

When we would arrive at someone’s home, I would always ask the homeowner and their family members what they saw. Before we got to the house, I gave Ev the details of who I crossed over. 

We were both blown away when the homeowners’ kids described precisely what I saw. Confirmation at its finest, knowing I wasn’t crazy or wacko was priceless. 

I mentioned I had to find out why the stuck beings were stuck in the first place. In my experience, it is because they were very sick, killed or tortured in a traumatic way, killed without them knowing it; some don’t want to leave a place or object behind, held against their will by another ghost, or had unfinished business. 

Almost every ghost I’ve dealt with didn’t know they were dead. Some were scared, clueless, comical, anxious, stubborn, or too young to know what happened. It’s true; most stuck ghosts are between 16-30 years old, with a few grumpy old men and women thrown in for good measure. 

Many ghosts I helped were women beaten, raped, or killed by men; others died of disease or sickness. The men were killed while fighting and shot their heads off either on purpose or without realizing when their guns accidentally went off. Some died of infections from wounds or sickness. 

I describe the difference between spirits and ghosts as spirits are souls that cross over and can come and go as they please, showing themselves to loved ones how they think their loved ones on earth would remember them at their best, especially in dreams.

Ghosts are stuck in a house, location, or to an object such as a piano or piece of jewelry. I see them at the moment of their death, not like a skeleton or creepy ghoul but as a sick or injured person. 

British cast.
American cast.
It’s hysterical how the ghosts are watching her smudge their new home with sage; they are like, wtf? Lol

This past winter, we watched a series called Ghosts. We watched the American version, but the original one was British. The series is brilliant and the closest thing to describing to people what it’s like to work in the middle world. 

The ghost characters stuck on a property in upstate NY know they are dead and waiting to get “sucked up” to the light. They can’t figure out why they are stuck. 

Each episode focuses on a different ghost. The show is a comedy and not scary at all. I highly recommend it as a feel-good series. 

Back to the middle world, am I frightened or disgusted? Weirdly, not at all. While in ordinary reality time I can’t look at an eyelash in someone’s eye or hear or think of anything medically wrong. I don’t know why the non-ordinary time stuff doesn’t bother me for the life of me. 

I did a lot of research on all the topics I discussed in this series. I found good and bad information. Some are legit services, and other money-making schemes are taking advantage of people and homeowners. 

I am using my calling or house-clearing abilities how other people use their callings, such as ministries or missionaries—volunteers working with the needy at homeless shelters or food pantries. 

Volunteering or working as a health care worker or in EMS agencies. I know some people who make a difference working with the elderly or refugees. Others donate money or services for free. Those in need are in need, whether in human or dead form. A calling is helping others the best way you can with your gifts. 

This last house clearing made me think about why I was chosen by the other side to be a medium in the middle world. Let’s face it; I have a tough guy; I’m going to kick your ass kind of attitude sometimes. I am patient, kind, understanding, and loving most of the time, but get my “Jersey” up, and it’s all over. 

You cannot be a wimp or show any fear; at the same time, have empathy, sympathy, and compassion, which I have. You have to think quickly on your feet and find the right words to say. You aren’t permitted to ever lie to the being and have to come from a place of love and light. That’s why I think I was chosen. 

I walked home from the actual in-person house clearing last week and was filled with humility and happiness for the souls that finally got to go home. I felt grateful to be able to help. My heart was full of love. I learned a lot from the “people” I met, some of which I liked. 

Well, that’s it for this series of healing and psychic abilities. I know some of you were fascinated or frightened; others must digest or try to understand it. Some may think I’m whacked and it’s too much. I get it.

My goal here wasn’t to rant and rave about the spooky things I do but to explain and have an honest discussion about topics most people don’t know about.

I want you not to be afraid of other healing modalities or trying new things. To think of life in a different way. To notice passed loved ones’ energy around us and acknowledge it; they love when they know you feel them. 

Thank you for reading this series and encouraging me to continue each week. It took a lot of courage for me to put all of this out there; Marty never knew half of what I did exactly. He told me some of it was scary, and it is for people. I would be scared for sure if it wasn’t me writing this.

Please email me at julziestyle@gmail.com if you have any questions or want to learn more about this series. I don’t teach any of my practices but can surely get you steered in the right direction.

Please remember, I don’t work with spirits or loved ones who have crossed over, meaning I don’t get messages for other people. I don’t know who to bet at the races or lottery numbers. Lol. 

They have been waiting at the mud room door for the guys to come home for two days. I am clearly only their private chef. 😂

Have a great rest of your Sunday; I am looking forward to my family coming home later today, I missed them, but Klaus and Otto really did.