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Cooking with Mema

Mema at our wedding. 💙

I love writing about my grandmothers. This afternoon, it felt like Mema was standing beside me, watching me make picnic sides for the bbq chicken I am grilling tonight.

When I was young, I knelt on a red kitchen stool with a back on it and two steps. I would watch Mema make her famous potato salad. I watched her make it many times; anyone having a picnic asked her to bring her potato salad.

I mainly observed, but she let me help decorate the top of the potato salad with slices of hard-boiled eggs and sliced pepper rings. I loved sprinkling to top with paprika too!

She would make 5 lbs of potato salad and serve it in a tin foil roasting pan so she wouldn’t worry about getting her pan back. 

When the potato salad got to where it was going, the Saran Wrap on top was smushed into the salad.

I used one of Mema’s bowls for my potato salad and pressed it down when I covered it like hers. I didn’t top my potato salad with egg slices or pepper rings this time.

Everyone loved her potato salad. I knew how she made it, so I made the potato salad myself when I got older. My mother couldn’t get over my potato salad tasted just like Mema’s. 

Mema cut her potatoes into small cubes, and her celery and onion were diced very small. You never got a big bite of any one ingredient. She made the mayo dressing in a separate bowl and made sure it tasted right before folding it into the salad. It was all cohesively done, with every bite tasting the same. I think that’s why it was so good. This is how I teach people how to make potato, macaroni, tuna, and egg salads.

It was easy to duplicate since she loosely followed the Hellman’s Mayo recipe on the side of the jar. She had to adjust it since she was making larger quantities. She would taste it and add a little more if this or that. The secret ingredient to her potato salad was all the love she put into it.

Luckily, I had the taste in my food memory, and my palate could duplicate hers. I still look at the Hellman’s recipe to remind myself what’s what. Then I add a little bit more this and that, just like Mema did. Lots of love goes into my potato salad too.

I also watched her make deviled eggs, which are still my favorite. I duplicate hers whenever I make them. I made them for the kids at school when I was the food service director and cook. They would gobble them up within seconds and loved them. 

My baked beans were my creation when I was around 12 years old. Whenever my parents had a picnic or went to one they requested I make my beans. 

I knew even at 12 how I wanted them to taste and would adjust the ingredients until they were just right. Then I would add strips of bacon to the top and pop it into the oven. I knew the beans were done when it bubbled and the bacon was cooked.

Yum! My baked beans are studded with bits of bacon!

After four decades of making baked beans, I figured something out. Instead of leaving the bacon in strips, today, I diced it and arranged it on top of the beans. 

After all these years, I solved the problem with the strips of bacon on top. There were a few slices of bacon, and someone always glommed them all before anyone else got any. Another issue with the whole strips was the bacon was always soggy underneath, even if the tops looked done. The bacon glom didn’t mind, though.

Now, each bite of the baked beans had small amounts of crispy bacon. This is so brilliant. I can’t believe how long it took me!

This is Mema with Noah and me at a family party. She was always smiling when kids were around. I can still smell the powder she wore. Geez, I miss her!

These picnic sides make me feel like I am 10 years old again and taste the same! The only thing I am sad about is that Mema isn’t here to have some with me.

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Make the best of it…

Getting ready for the concert tonite.

Yesterday, I read a quote from a friend Robert who I know from my hometown and high school, John F Kennedy, in Iselin, NJ.

His quote struck a chord so deep it hit my core. It said, “Once conscious of life’s end we make the best of it!” RWB

Holy shit! It was like that quote woke me up and made me realize what’s been going on since my mother Eileen died back in October. I haven’t written anything about my mother’s death and rarely speak if it. 

I say died because when I walked into the comfort care room with the nurse at the care facility 30 seconds after she died I said, “Oh no, she’s dead.” 

My mother didn’t pass away peacefully in her sleep like I imagined she would. The look of terror and fear in her wide open dead eyes was shocking to me. The expression on the rest of her face, that was turned facing the door I walked through has haunted me since that night. 

The image I saw looked just like or worse than any Halloween corpse mask I had ever seen. When I was in her room with the staff gathering together some of her items to take home I would forget and turn around or look up and see it over and over. 

Every day I have to get rid of that last image of my mother. I am sad that it is the last thing I saw but then again she always left me upset whenever I visited while she was alive; this was just the icing on the cake. I kept thinking she got me good this time. The last time.

After reading Robert’s quote many things about that image make sense now. That image showed me what the end of someone’s life really looks like. Maybe that’s why it terrified me so much. 

The only dead people I have ever seen have been in an open casket in a funeral parlor. The last time I saw my dad in his casket was extremely difficult and upsetting but at least he looked like he was peacefully sleeping. 

Marty and Sam have seen their share of dead people over the years on the rescue squad. Marty was an assistant medical examiner for a couple of years and Sam is a nurse. When I say their share, I mean a lot.

When I told them what my mother looked like they told me that’s how dead people look. Ok, not helping fellas. I felt sheltered and stupid. I always knew I wasn’t cut out for the medical field, now I was 100% certain.

After seeing what the end of one’s life looks like I did become conscious of it without me knowing. I told myself during the pandemic I was going to make the best of the life I have right now. We don’t know when that day will be so we better make the most of it.

Since then, I’ve gone to NYC twice in one month to see my favorite play Hamilton with Marty and again with my sister Jennifer. All I could think of while I was in the city was, “Why in fucks name did it take you so long to come back dummy?” I am talking about the decade before the pandemic so that’s not an excuse. 

Tonight, we are going to our first concert since the pandemic. It’s a hard rock concert in Glen’s Falls, NY. We are seeing the bands Seether and Breaking Benjamin whom we have seen a few years back.

When Marty asked me if I wanted to go I didn’t hem and haw about it like I normally would have. I said yes right away. He asked me a few days ago if I wanted to go see another band this summer I’ve been dying to see. I bounced around the house saying, “Yes!”

Robert’s quote came from the death of his own mother this time last year. In that time he decided he was going to lose weight, which he has lost 60 lbs so far and to do an activity for exercise he would enjoy. 

He picked dirt bike riding as his exercise.  My son Noah who dirt bikes told me a while ago that people don’t realize how physical a sport it is. Robert can dirt bike and spend time with his son while they are both getting in a fun workout. Good for them!

Now when that final image of my mother pops into my head, instead of telling it to go away, I’ll thank it for reminding me to do the things I want to do and go to the places I want to travel to. To live my life now and have fun. 

“Once you become conscious of life’s end you make the best of it!”

Thanks so much to my friend Robert Wilson Barnes of Greenville, SC for letting me share his quote and story. 🙂

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Marty’s brisket…

Last summer, we tried teaching ourselves how to use a smoker. We had many failures and a success or two by the end of the summer.

Smoking meats is not grilling. Grilling is predictable and manageable like cooking. Smoking meats is getting the wood fire to a perfect low temperature and keeping it that way for hours. 

Keeping that low temp wood fire is much more complicated than you think. Airflow is a significant factor in temperature control. I find this part tricky because my fire always gets too hot.

Last summer, I incinerated a gorgeous brisket, a pork shoulder, and chicken parts beyond recognition. So damn annoying and wasteful, but we learned what not to do, so there’s that.

We found out that professional temperature probes are essential for smoking meats. Sam gave me a set of probes with digital remotes for Christmas. 

I used the temp probes for different meats I roasted over the winter, and guess what? Everything came out perfectly done. Go figure! 

Marty wanted to try smoking the brisket this time; I was okay with it and glad he wanted to take charge. I made the sides—no pressure for me.

He used the temp probes, putting one in the smoker and one in the brisket. The brisket was seasoned with only salt and pepper, as the pros do—no other rubs.

He kept an eye on the brisket during the 5-hour smoke. It was a small brisket, only around 4 lbs, so he was careful to go slow and low as they tell you to do.

After 2 hours into the smoke time, he wrapped the brisket tightly with foil and put it back in the smoker for 3 more hours. He kept checking the temperature on the remote he kept with him, which was better than constantly running back and forth to the smoker.

After taking the brisket out of the smoker, he kept it wrapped up for a couple more hours, sealing in all those juices.

Unwrapping smoked meats is like when you take a soufflé, popovers, or cream puffs out of the oven. You can’t open the oven to check on soufflés or pâte à choux (cream puffs) because they will deflate. This is a hold your breath moment. A moment that can go from cries of joy to what-the-fucks in a blink of an eye. 

When we unwrapped the brisket, it was gorgeous! It was soft and moist. It had the right amount of smoke taste and a beautiful red smoke ring. Marty was like a proud peacock! He should be because he nailed it! Woot woot!

It sliced easily and glistened. It had the right amount of fat and wasn’t dry at all. BBQ we’ve gotten out the last few times had been a disappointment. 

The disappointing briskets from a couple of bbq joints were extremely dry, flavorless meats that required copious amounts of sauces and a big beverage to choke them down. We almost gave up hope for good brisket again.

Every year I can remember my “best bite of the year” for years to come. These “best bites” become incredible food memories for me. This brisket was my “best bite of the year” so far.

Marty’s glistening brisket, candied sweet potatoes, and creamy coleslaw. OMG!

I wished I could have had my stomach stretched so I could have eaten more. The sides I made complimented the brisket like a symphony. Salty, sweet, creamy, tangy, crunchy, smokey, and delicious.

The brisket was perfectly smoked and had an incredible unctuous mouthfeel. What the fuckity is unctuous, you may be asking yourself?

Unctuous is a word that describes how moist, slippery, or fatty something is. It’s often used to describe foods rich in fat. It’s sexy food.

Using the word unctuous is describing something with total gluttony and not caring. We don’t eat unctuous foods every day, so when I do I enjoy the texture and richness; guilt-free.

Back to the brisket, I didn’t want this meal to end; it was that amazing. I reheated some brisket by steaming it this morning for Sam when he got home from his overnight shift at the hospital.

He got a huge smile on his face and couldn’t believe how moist and delicious the brisket was. “The smoke is perfect,” he said. I am smiling because the two of us are so much alike regarding food.

Marty’s delicious brisket was the last thing I thought about before I fell asleep last night; I kid you not! It was that good. Marty is now the head bbq smoker in the family. 🙌🏼

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Front porch – 2022 edition…

The weather people lied again! The decent weather with sunshine didn’t happen until later Sunday afternoon. Saturday was too windy and cold to work outside, washing the house and front porch.

The front of our house and front porch has been in dire need of a good scrubbing with a house cleaner. We get a lot of dust and dirt living on the main road, but it’s all part of the charm of living in an old historic house.

We talked about our front porch when we were stuck at home with covid and decided to change things up this year.

We both agreed on no huge petunias this year. They block the view of the street and make a mess. I loved them but want a cleaner look with less upkeep.

We picked out some new pillows and outdoor area rugs, a small plant stand, and a couple of candles. I still need to buy some new flower pots and eventually flowers. 

Project dirty porch lasted most of the day, but we were happy with the results. Everything is clean, including the sectional furniture that needed a good scrub.

Klausie-boy & Otto

The sun came out while we were finishing up, then we sat on the porch with a drink for the first time this year. The boys, Otto & Klaus were so happy to be sitting on the porch again too. Otto looked like a young pup in this one photo.

It’s still cold and far from summer weather, but I didn’t mind wearing a hoody sipping a glass of Prosecco while watching the world whiz by. 🙁

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Thai pork peanut curry…

I was thinking last week that for someone who has a cooking and living blog, I haven’t written about food for a few weeks.

For three weeks or so, our business, The Vermont Spätzle Company, was rocking. We had spätzle orders from our wholesale accounts out the ass. We worked hard, pulling double production days to fill all of those orders.

It was almost like the universe dumped all the orders on us at once in that short time period because right after we were done, we got covid. The universe has a funny way of doing those types of things. I always acknowledge those situations and am grateful.

Did we eat while we were busy with production? Of course, we ate but nothing to write home about. A few years ago, a friend of mine asked me on Facebook if we “ever ate the same shit like everyone else?” I am not sure if my friend Randy or his twin brother Ray asked, but it still makes me giggle when I think about it.

Tonight I went with Thai cuisine. I love Thai food and how flavorful everything is. When I say flavorful, I don’t mean spicy; that’s what my timid eating cooking students thought. They learned when you are making any cuisine; you have control over the amount of spice you put into a dish. Just because a recipe calls for a certain amount, you can add a little at a time or none at all.

I used a popular recipe on the internet, one that a million food bloggers call their own when they are copying and pasting. Come on, people, this is your business for Christs’ sake; at least change things up to make it look like your own. They all even use the same photo! 🤦🏻‍♀️

I’ve learned a trick or two when preparing Thai cuisine that makes such a difference. Things once again they don’t tell you in recipes. For instance, whenever I make a Thai curry dish, I slowly poach whatever protein in the curry sauce. This gentle cooking method doesn’t dry the protein out like if you stir fry it first as the recipes instruct doing.

I have most of the curry dishes down when it comes to Thai cooking, but I still haven’t made a Pad Thai dish I am happy with. It’s a work in progress that is taking years. I order it sometimes when I go out to remind my palate what I am shooting for.

The recipe I made tonight is easy, even if you’ve never made Thai food before. Here is the link to the recipe I used. If you don’t like spicy food, start with a tablespoon of curry paste instead of the 4 Tbsp the recipe calls for.

Speaking of curry paste, where can you find it? Thai curry pastes are available in the ethnic section of most supermarkets; you don’t have to make a special trip to an Asian market to find some. If I can find curry paste up here in Vermont, you can find it anywhere.

I served my pork peanut curry with jasmine rice which I always use a rice cooker for. This small appliance is invaluable to me because I hate babysitting rice while it’s cooking. It’s tough to make a perfect pot of rice, believe it or not. All Asian people own a rice cooker and use it every day.

I also roasted some brussel sprouts and tossed them last minute with a bit of Thai sweet chili sauce, soy sauce, and sesame oil and threw them back into the oven for a few minutes. They became caramelized and tasty.

Today we picked up a brisket that we found on sale when we went grocery shopping. The cupboards were pretty bare after being in isolation for ten days. We needed to do a big shop even though Sam picked up a few important essentials like milk and chocolate pudding cups for me. 😜

Since we will still be home from our farmers market tomorrow, we will fire up the smoker and make our first brisket of the year. We learned a lot about what not to do last year, so hopefully, it will turn out smokey, juicy, and delicious. I’ll report back. Smoking meats is no easy task, even though they make it look easy on tv.

Happy Friday! Enjoy your weekend, everyone. I will be doing some outdoor projects taking advantage of the nicer weather with sunshine in the forecast! 😎

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Checking in…

Today is day nine since my covid symptoms started. Everyone has their own thoughts and ideas about covid, isolation, and re-entering the world.

That being said, I wanted to look at the latest CDC recommendations and guidelines regarding isolation and returning to the world. It states:

If you had COVID-19 and had symptoms, isolate for at least 5 days. To calculate your 5-day isolation period, day 0 is your first day of symptoms. Day 1 is the first full day after your symptoms developed. You can leave isolation after 5 full days.

  • You can end isolation after 5 full days if you are fever-free for 24 hours without the use of fever-reducing medication and your other symptoms have improved (Loss of taste and smell may persist for weeks or months after recovery and need not delay the end of isolation ).
  • You should continue to wear a well-fitting mask around others at home and in public for 5 additional days (day 6 through day 10) after the end of your 5-day isolation period. If you are unable to wear a mask when around others, you should continue to isolate for a full 10 days. Avoid people who have weakened immune systems or are more likely to get very sick from COVID-19, and nursing homes and other high-risk settings, until after at least 10 days.
  • If you continue to have fever or your other symptoms have not improved after 5 days of isolation, you should wait to end your isolation until you are fever-free for 24 hours without the use of fever-reducing medication and your other symptoms have improved. Continue to wear a well-fitting mask through day 10. Contact your healthcare provider if you have questions.
  • See additional information about travel.
  • Do not go to places where you are unable to wear a mask, such as restaurants and some gyms, and avoid eating around others at home and at work until a full 10 days after your first day of symptoms.

If an individual has access to a test and wants to test, the best approach is to use an antigen test1 towards the end of the 5-day isolation period. Collect the test sample only if you are fever-free for 24 hours without the use of fever-reducing medication and your other symptoms have improved (loss of taste and smell may persist for weeks or months after recovery and need not delay the end of isolation). If your test result is positive, you should continue to isolate until day 10. If your test result is negative, you can end isolation, but continue to wear a well-fitting mask around others at home and in public until day 10. Follow additional recommendations for masking and avoiding travel as described above.

Whew! Okay, by going by these latest recommendations, I could have gone out with a well-fitting mask four days ago after tomorrow, which, according to the guidelines, I could go out without a mask.

After re-reading these guidelines for days, I decided that’s it. Enough. I have felt better for four days and five without a fever. Today was the first day I went out to the bank drive-through and to buy trash bags. I hate that I felt guilty about going out.

It goes back to everyone having different thoughts and opinions, expressing them, sometimes shaming people for their own views.

According to the CDC, I had no reason to feel guilty but did because I let others’ opinions get into my head.

We all have to trust each other and have faith people are doing what’s right. We’ve decided to postpone production until next week, so our customers feel safe. I am staying home from dance class tonight for the same reason, even though I could have taught only with a mask.

When you feel sick, it’s easy to stay home, but being isolated when you feel healthy and full of energy is maddening. It’s like watching your life go by while you stand there watching it drift away.

This morning we both hit a wall. We had to get up, get dressed, and start doing projects around the house again. Marty is working on the outdoor electricity for the pool while I am cleaning closets.

I haven’t written for the past couple of days since I haven’t had a damn thing to write about. No one wants to read when someone is bored or having a pity party for themselves. I’m right about this, aren’t I?

I am about to close the chapter on my covid sickness and move forward to live my life unapologetically to the fullest. 🙂 Thanks for your support, care, and kind words during my illness; I appreciated it.

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Say it isn’t so…

I am feeling much better and so is Marty; he’s a day or so behind me. I feel almost completely back to normal just a little tired.

I am climbing the walls bored to death now that I am feeling better. We are still holding off on production for a couple more days, but today I worked on the chalkboards for the outdoor farmers market. I have filing that needs to be done too.

We are starting to need some basic supplies and while I am well enough to go get them, I feel like I need to isolate for a little while longer. When I finally do go out I’ll be masked up for another week.

Right now, I am sitting on our back deck getting some fresh air. The temperature is a seasonably warm 63-degrees. The deck boards are warm on my bare feet. It is a nice spring day and hard to believe we are under a winter storm watch for tonight.

Yesterday, it snowed on Easter Sunday, not only here in Vermont, but in parts of Pennsylvania as well. The little bit of snow that stuck to the ground has melted. This kind of weather is completely normal for our area.

Tonight however, we are forecasted to get up to six inches of heavy, wet snow. Ugh! Talk about rubbing salt in my wounds of already being stuck at home, but stuck inside too? This totally blows.

I don’t know how much more television I can possibly watch. Yesterday, Marty and I watched a documentary about a young guy living alone for two years in the woods while building a log cabin by hand; complete with a secret hidden underground food pantry.

The documentary only had sounds but no talking. His dog only barked once. We actually paused the show when we needed to get a drink or go to the bathroom.

Why should you care about this? You shouldn’t, but it’s a description of how pathetic things are for me right now. Lol!

Have a great night guys. I’ll be keeping my fingers and toes crossed the weather forecast is wrong and we don’t clobbered with a lot of snow. 🤞🏼

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New flavorful fare…

Shakshuka photo credit Jen A

I am a cook. I love cooking, and even more, I love to cook for people. It gives me so much joy when I make something delicious and watch people enjoy it. 

Whenever my sister Jen comes to VT, I have the menu and the shopping done. I don’t mise en place or prep anything because we like to cook together. 

When I stayed at her house last week, she had the menu and the shopping done and didn’t prep anything either.

Her children were away with her ex, so she had an opportunity to make anything I told her, except fishy-fish, lol. She wanted me to try some flavors and dishes she loves.

It’s fun watching her prep and cook. Jen is a pediatric dentist which is evident in how she cooks and bakes. Everything is done precisely and methodically.

I love that she tastes her food along the way and adjusts the seasoning. She is reading the book Salt, Fat, Acid, Heat, which was a culinary game-changer for me. You can also watch the four-part series on Netflix. 

Shakshuka

We had Shakshuka on Saturday night with roasted potatoes. I wrote about shakshuka in an Eggs in Purgatory blog post a few months ago, but this was my first time having it. 

It was delicious and comforting. The eggs which were cooked in the flavorful tomato sauce were done perfectly. The dish was delicious, something I would make for brunch. 

Lebanese omelet

Monday, she made a Lebanese omelet, another thing I had never had before. The omelet was full of veggies, parsley, and mint. The mint was the ingredient that made it different from other omelets; I was surprised I liked the mint so much. It was light and full of flavor. 

Monday night, we had my favorite dish, a roasted beet salad. The beets were piled on a pool of an herb and olive oil vinaigrette topped with avocado and dill. 

Roasted beet salad

The flavors all worked together, with the sweet roasted beets being the star of the show. I will be making this one when beets are in season at the farmers market. 

She also made a Middle Eastern lentil soup with the beet salad. I was expecting a thick and dark soup and what we had was the complete opposite.

The lentil soup had rice in it and was topped with caramelized onions. The soup was brothy and light. The caramelized onions were the hero of this dish. The soup has so much more flavor than it looked. It was yummy.

I was the sous chef, chopping onions, garlic, and herbs. I cleaned up as she cooked. It was nice to take a backseat and let someone else cook for me. 

I had no urge to take over like I usually would in the kitchen because I wasn’t familiar with any of the dishes. 

I am so glad Jen shared these dishes and flavors with me; each was a pleasant surprise for my taste buds, plus the time we spent in the kitchen was priceless. 🙂

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Cravings…


I am on day six of having covid and I am still sick. Nothing serious, just sick. I thought I was feeling better yesterday then I started to get congested before bed.

Misery loves company so Marty joined me in the covid department yesterday. He pretty much feels like I do. We both have such major fatigue it’s easy to rest all of the time.

The weird thing with having covid is I am craving foods like crazy. Normally, when I have a craving I make whatever it is. I have been craving roasted chicken since Wednesday. Luckily for me it cooks itself and I had one in the freezer. 

We didn’t loose our taste or smell but mine is dampened a bit because of my stuffy nose however the smell of the chicken roasting is heavenly and is making my stomach growl.

Through this entire sickness I have been starving. I mean STARVING! The bad part is I don’t have the energy or want to cook. We’ve been living on simple things that don’t require much or any cooking.

The other thing I am craving are sweet things, something I hardly ever crave. I want ice cream and those little chocolate pudding cups with whipped cream sprayed from a can. Funny right? Of all the things to crave. Lol.

I just threw some rice, chicken broth and some seasonings into the rice cooker; another dish that cooks by itself to go with the chicken later. The best part is there will be hardly any dishes to wash.

I was thinking yesterday that this is the first Easter I am not making a big dinner. It will be as simple as it gets. It will also just be the two of us having dinner.

We did pick up a tiny ham before we came down with covid so I will bake that. I also have some asparagus on hand and will make some easy kind of potatoes.

No deviled eggs or pizzagaina like I always make. No brunch quiche, Easter desserts or little dinner rolls for leftover ham sliders. 

You know what? It’s ok. I am actually too tired to care and here’s the thing, I don’t have to make those things only on Easter Day. I can make them anytime. 

I wish you all a very Happy Easter, Passover or Sunday, which ever you celebrate. 🙂