For better or for worse…

October 21, 1989

Two weeks ago, Marty said the nicest thing that meant the world to me. We’ve been together since 1985; 38 years later, he still gives me the butterflies and surprises me with the little things in life.

If you know anything about me, I don’t sugarcoat things, to say our relationship is all sunshine and roses; it’s not. It’s a marriage.

Sometimes, I want to hit him over the head with a frying pan or wring his neck, but we always talk it out and make up a couple of hours later. 

We have never gone to bed mad at each other. It’s a lot of give and take, the fine art of compromising.

You can’t throw in the towel, folks, when things get tough; that’s the for better or for worse part of most wedding vows. Marriage is work. Period.

A toast to us.

When couples stand before a priest, rabbi, justice of the peace, or ordained minister, they say those words but have no idea what they are in for down the road. It is all sunshine and roses at that moment, so enjoy it.

For the last 28 years, it’s been up to me to figure out what in fucks name to make for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. It is not an easy task that is daunting and never-ending. It was even more challenging when the boys were growing up.

One hot night, when I was exhausted and didn’t feel like cooking, Marty said, “It shouldn’t always be your job to figure out what to make for dinner.” What??? Did I hear right?

After he uttered those words, I could imagine a choir of angels singing like in a TV commercial. I was so stunned and happy. I ran over, kissed him on the cheek, and hugged him. This is a game-changer, people!  

Last week, when I came home exhausted from a long day of work and dance classes, Marty had dinner and a caffeine-free rum and coke with a lemon wedge waiting for me. It was so good, and I didn’t have to make it!

This was such a sweet thing, and I appreciated it. Until now, I would come home, drag in groceries, put them away, and then reheat something I made after production before I left for Bennington.

When I didn’t have time to make something ahead, I would whip something together; those nights, we didn’t eat until after 9 pm. 

Tuesday night, we discussed what we could have on dance night. We decided on cubano sandwiches made from leftover pork and leftover hot-crash potatoes.

Look at Nelly in the bottom right corner. I am so thrilled relaxing with my cocktail. ❤️

When I got home last night, Marty had everything ready to make the sandwiches, the flattop grill was hot, and a rum and coke waiting for me. 🤗

I watched him make our cubano sandwiches while sipping my drink and telling him about my day. We were done eating at 9 pm. How wonderful! Honestly, it’s so enjoyable now when I get home late from dance.

Marty may not know how happy this makes me. We are business partners; now I feel like we are swans, life partners, sharing responsibilities at home, like we do at work.

One of my favorite photos of us was taken by my sister Jennifer.

Marriage is ever-evolving; we are in it for the long haul, for better or for worse, through good times and bad. 

We’ve had our share of both and are always there for each other; we are very blessed, indeed. 💞

Have a great day. I’m off to work.