Samhain…

I’ve always enjoyed this time of year not only because of Halloween but also because it is a time to remember those who came before us or All Souls Day.

When I was little whenever we visited my grand-pop’s grave, I looked at all the old mausoleums while walking to the water spicket to fill up the flower holder that slipped down into the earth.

I wonder if the people inside the fancy, schmancy, tiny marble houses had people visit them. We went to the cemetery with Nana once a week.

There were never any flowers around the mausoleums, and we never saw any visitors. I would say hello to the people inside and tell them I’m sorry no one was visiting them.

I would wonder who all the people in the graveyard were since some of the graves were very old.

I also wondered who my people were since I was adopted. It bothered me a lot.

Now that I have my family history on both sides, I have an idea who my people were now and where they came from.

Before that, when I learned about the Mexican holiday celebrated on November 1, Dia De Los Muertos, it resonated deeply with me, but I didn’t know why.

I read and researched about the holiday celebrating those who came before us and wondered once again who came before me.

My attraction to sugar skulls and the Day of the Dead strengthened each year, and I longed to know more about my ancestors.

Finally, I had my family history but it didn’t seem to fit into the Mexican cultural holiday for me. Maybe because I felt silly since I’m not Mexican.

Then, this year, it happened when I discovered I was not only a witch in this lifetime, but I knew I was in other lifetimes.

This spring, summer, and fall were different for me. I felt connected to the earth, to the plants, trees, rocks, birds, and other small animals I started noticing outside.

I felt deep inside that this was me, not just in this lifetime, but I had experienced all of this before, too many times to even imagine.

I have many friends who are witches, and they always post pagan holidays and celebrations on their Facebook pages.

I’ve heard of Samhain, celebrated on November 1, but I never knew what it was except that witches celebrated.

This year I learned that Samhain pronounced sow-wn marks the end of the year or cycle when things die and things are out to rest until spring

The holiday is celebrated with harvest feasts that date back centuries in Ireland. Yes, I am 78% Irish.

The day is also about remembering and celebrating those who came before us, just like in Dia De Los Muertos!

In both celebrations, a place is set at the table for our ancestors, and their favorite foods or foods from the harvest are served.

After discovering so much about myself, it was important to me to celebrate Samhain this year.

I planned a Samhain dinner immediately following trick or treating. I researched Samhain recipes and traditions and realized I already had everything on hand to make my feast or dinner.

I invited our friends David and Arthur from next door to join us for a late supper. They go all out on Halloween like I do so I knew they would appreciate coming over to eat.

I set a place for all of our ancestors. We ate outside on our deck since the weather was unseasonably warm.

I made a butternut squash lasagna with layers of cheese, roasted butternut squash, and other roasted veggies made into the sauce, as well as a sautéed mushroom, shallot, and spinach layer. It was topped with a lovely béchamel sauce.

Wow! It was so damn flavorful and delicious. It meant a lot when Marty told me how much he loved it since I wasn’t sure he would even like it.

Here is a link to the recipe if you are interested in trying it out. https://www.feastingathome.com/butternut-lasagna-with-mushrooms-and-sage/

I made a simple salad of greens tossed with sliced onions, diced apple, and candied pecans and dressed with a maple balsamic vinaigrette.

For dessert, I made individual ramekins filled with pumpkin custard. Both were home runs along with the lasagna.

I worked hard on my Samhain dinner, and for once in my life, this celebration felt right. I was so into this meal that I forgot to take photos.

My Samhain celebration was right for the little girl in the cemetery and for the confused young woman who shot back tequila shots wishing she celebrated how the Mexicans did.

Not only did I think about my blood ancestors but also of my adopted family members who have passed.

I thought of my own past lives and celebrated who I was in those.

This year of monumental transformation felt like it was the end of the year or another turn of the wheel for me.

I finally feel like I belong to a group and can celebrate those who came before me like people have done probably since civilization began.